I was deeply saddened to hear that George Carlin died. I have been a huge fan of his for a long time, ever since I was small, waited for my folks to leave the house, and put on my mom's record of George's "AM & FM" album. I am grateful for all the times he made me laugh, think, and plot out little bits of anarchy. I actually tried bartering with a toll booth operator. I count myself lucky to actually see him live in Pittsburgh for a concert. Very funny, and he di deliver the goods. I was suprised to see how freakin' tiny the dude was! Real small & thin. The black clothing made him look even thinner.

I have seen two comedians live, in concert, where I had to buy a ticket for the event. Two of the best, in my opinion, THE two best. Both George Carlin and Sam Kinison were idols to me, and I miss the hell out of the both of ya!

Always Yours..Just Laughing Less

The Dancing Queen

Went into Harvard's determined to play smash & grab poker. First hand,I'm big blind, & I was dealt aces. Huzzah! Limp, limp, raise to 150, fold fold fold fold, to me. Bump to 600. 2 jagoffs call. Don't care what the board says, I'm pushing as soon as it comes. A guy calls who flopped a pair of kings, & my aces hold up. Now, I've more that doubled up, so I pretty much shut it down for a while. Bleed off a few chips to see about getting lucky on a flop, but nothing really big. Just before final table, I get my vengance on deaf dude for last week, and I double up through him when I pushed with a pair of kings on the flop, and he was outkicked. Final table, alternate between folding mediocre hands & pushing with crap. Secure a decent chip stack. A REALLY pregnant lady limps, small blind, who is a pretty darned good player, limps, and I push with king queen off. Preggers calls, & has me outchipped by one freakin' black.Good player folds. She shows 8 7 hearts. An 8 a ...

Really frustrated today. Got home late from work because of some annoying, needy, whiny customers just had to be taken care of, and company policy won't allow me to tell them to go take a flying "F" at a rolling doughnut. Wanted to! Always want to, but I gotta save that for when I quit my friggin' job. Crack open a beer, flip off a customer or two, then turn in my keys at the end of the day! That's the dream, anyway.

I'm reading up on strategy for playing better poker, but I believe that the articles are written for players who play against "good" players. Not really suited for Nipple Poker! So I'm trying out different things, most of which go down in flames. I'm gonna try out "Smash & Grab" tomorrow. Super tight play, but when I got a hand, raise the piss out of the pot. If everyone limps for 50, make it an additional 500. limp for 100, raise 1k. But not with crap. With monsters. And if no one plays back, collect the chips. If someone does pl ...

I am suck a freakin' DONK! I'm so disgusted with my play from Wednesday night that it took me 2 days to cool off enough to bitch about it. Okay, full space cadet mode again, having a blast. My first table had Mike, a really, really good player, and a bunch of seat holders. I am playing my "A" game from the start, slowly building my stack, and catching cards at the right times. I don't crack anybody, but I'm making progress. Go on a downward slide just after the break, and I'm back to about a starting stack. Table gets broken up, & Mike & I go to another table with Mr. Slick, a top-notch player who is incessantly bitching about how he can't get any cards tonight, another player, I'm really bad with names, so he'll be "Deaf, Eric Seidel-looking Dude" or Deaf Dude for short. The rest are uber-aggressive luckboxes, including Ricky, the amazing horseshoe-up-the-butt boy. I play tight, make a call against deaf dude where I had top pair-king kicker & he shows trip ...

Shaved off the Playoff Beard. It was as liberating as anything I've ever experienced! No more getting little bits of moustache hair in my coffee! No more incessant scratching! I now have access to my zits! Feels good.

Missed my Wednesday at John Harvard's. Will be back next week. Don't think I've forgotten about you, Red. You cocky little bastard, I've got you figured out! I'm hoping I get on at your table to start. Don't care which position, I'm gonna strip the meat from your bones next time!

Cannabalisticly Yours,

The Dancing Queen

Damn stupid day.

Damn stupid Red Wings beating my Pens.

Damn stupid illness affecting my wife and one-year old baby.

Damn stupid restrictions on my poker play. I gotta be home to take care of the wife & kids.

Damn stupid germs hitting me, just not as hard as the rest of the family.

Damn stupid house in need of cleaning.

Damn. Damn. Damn.

Stupid.

As Always

The Damn Stupid Dancing Queen

This hand really has affected my play from here on out:

Moy's Cove(I miss it soooo).Blinds at 100/200. I had been playing pretty tight, but I doubled up when I called an all-in by someone with two pair on the flop and caught my flush on the turn. Sitting on about 8500. I'm small blind. Cute Blonde Off-duty Waitress is in the big blind. Beloved Old Crumudgeon Herb is in the steal position, the rest pretty much empty seats. After the deal, people are folding faster than Superman on laundry day. Herb limps in, button folds, and I look down at K-7 of spades. I figure (I'll limp in with a suited king to see a cheap flop) without saying it, of course, and throw in another green. Waitress checks. Flop is King-Seven-Seven.

Yahtzee!

I check, waitress throws in 500. Herb shoots her a look of utter constipation (really, he looked bound up!) and folds angrily. I slowly call, thinking she has a king. Turn is a six. I check again, and waitress throws out ...

My beloved Penguins are making a fantastic run through the Stanley Cup playoffs, so a bunch of guys at work decided to show their support and grow "Playoff Beards". I also am growing by beard in support. I can't play hockey (can't even skate!), I can't afford tickets, but darn it, I can grow hair! So they keep winning and winning, and my beard continues to grow. Now I'm absolutely miserable, because I have this mangled thatch of unkempt facial pubes that itches constantly! And it's freakin' red! I used to have bright red hair, but it turned brown through age. Not my dang beard! Bright red! I soooo want to shave this crap off, but they're doing so well. I know my whiskers have nothing to do with them winning, but... well, if I shave and they get bounced, I'll blame my razor! I know, it's dumb, dumb, dumb, but I'm in it butt deep now. So, Go Pens, and please, win it all quickly!

Itchily Yours

The Dancing Queen

Had my fun at John Harvard's, always enjoy acting weird for everyone else to laugh at (though it's not really an act!). Had to wait until I got some chirping chips to do so, and I was card dead for the first 2 rounds of blinds. Found my pidgeon in the form of Mr Slick's Chick. Mr. Slick (REALLY bad with names, so I gove most people nicknames) is an outstanding player, who made a televised appearance on Mansion Poker. His lady friend (Wife? Girlfriend? Sister? Not sure.) is a solid player in her own right. She raises from under the gun for 700 with blinds at 100-200. I look down at cowboys and push for 3625. Everyone else folds, but I know Chick is calling. She does, and turns over queens. Board is junk, and I get all her chips. Now the Space Cadet can make an appearance! I'm joking, taunting, laughing, having a good time, and encouraging others to do so, as well. I fake bluff the host, as well. Blinds 500-1000, I got arount 12k. Dealt A-5 off-suit on the button. Host raises to 2500 & ...